Along this journey of life, I have established within my thought that I should have grown to 5’8″. The truth is, I am 5’7″ and 3/4th. I remember the exact moment this seed of I should be 5’8″ was planted and oh how it has framed how I have discussed my height to this day. I am embarrassed to admit the many years I have put 5’8″ on my driver’s license. After all I am just rounding up right? Somehow rounding up justifies! The thought process to be 1/4 inch taller appears better, more accepting, desirable. The truth is, you were beautifully and wonderfully created therefore the bottom line is you are enough!
Several years ago, I was fortunate to play on my high school basket ball team. Let’s just say, my high school was small. To experience tryouts was foreign; you signed up, you were pretty much in. With that said, we had spirit! As it turned out, when it came to winning a championship that was the far fetched dream we were working toward. I played as a small forward and averaged a good 10-15 points a game. Plenty of rebounds and assists, I was a team player.
At the beginning of one season, like any other season, my coach measured each player’s height for our team roster which was published out to our conference. Prior to the measurement I was 5’7″& 3/4th. I had been at this height for a few years and up to this point I had stopped growing. The opportunity came and my coach measured my height and low and behold, I was 5’7″ & 3/4th. He remeasured again, and reminded me to stand up as straight as possible. How could I possibly be JUST 5’7″ & 3/4th. I stood as tall as possible without being on my tiptoes and yet my height remained the same, 5’7″ &3/4th. I remember my coach looking at me and saying; “You know we can’t put this height on the roster. We will round up 1/4 inch taller to 5’8″” he laughed. I laughed with him. Sure enough, 5’8″ sounded better and looked better on our roster. In fact EVERYONE grew a few inches or so that day, at least on paper.
When I look back, in that moment, I didn’t think much of it. Rounding up was fine and after reviewing other teams rosters, no one was listed as 5’7″ & 3/4th. Literally no one’s height was broken into 1/4ths. However, little did I know, this seed of “not good enough” would add to the shame I felt during my childhood. The shame of not knowing who I was and the insecurity I experienced during my teen years of coming from a bi-racial background. My coach truly meant no harm by rounding up. However, in that moment, 5’7″ & 3/4th was not good enough, didn’t measure up and started a thought pattern of how I viewed myself for many years.
I am sure at one moment or many you have felt insecure or that you didn’t measure up. You may feel some area in your life you desire for the 1/4 of and inch taller. This “1/4th inch taller” is a deep rooted fear statement that speaks: you are not enough. Let me tell you, whatever your 1/4in taller is, know that you are created just the way you are for a purpose AND you are so beautifully enough. In God’s eyes you are enough because you were fearfully and wonderfully created. Oh that your soul would know and rejoice this truth!
Psalm 139:14 “I will give thanks unto thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: Wonderful are they works; and that my soul knoweth right well.”
Beloved, God sees us differently! Each detail about you, your eyes, your smile, your touch all unique to you. What if you released your desire for “1/4 inch taller” and face the fear that you are not enough. Imagine the peace and joy you would walk in knowing that you are enough. You are beautifully and wonderfully created and truly that is more than enough!